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April 04, 2009

Letters From North America by Peary Perry 04-03-09

Anyone who has been married for any length of time can identify with what I am about to say.

Aside from the physical aspects, there is a distinct difference between the way men think and the way women think. Trust me on this one.

As you know, if you have been reading this for some time, we just moved into another house. I won’t bore you with a repeat of the dangers associated with making the actual move. This week I’d like to cover a few things that have happened after the move.

The first is that women seem to think about a garbage disposal the same way as a man thinks about a chipper/shredder. The one in the house we moved into was the ever popular ‘weasel’ model and is about 1/3 horsepower. Barely enough to chew up wet paper towels. My loving wife is used to the giant industrial commercial grade one I had installed in our previous house. This was the 5 horsepower (Turbo-Destructor Model 9500) with the rope pull start cord which could be used in case of emergency. You could grind up a stump or angle iron if you needed to do so. I think you had to have some sort of national security clearance just to own one.

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March 28, 2009

A Nation of Fools by Peary Perry 03-25-09

Well, you have to give Barack Obama credit for one thing.

No other president that I know of in history has managed to screw up so much in such a short period of time. He is the champion.

Where to start?

How about his screw up with the teleprompter (you know that device he uses whenever his mouth moves) when the Irish Premier was in town. The Irish Premier got confused reading from the teleprompter and Obama stepped in to help out. Lots have been written about who said what and so forth. I suppose my question is simply this….when will we ever see Obama WITHOUT a teleprompter? Last nights news conference showed that he is obviously aware of the fact that everyone knows he is dependent on this device. Last night he moved (not very effectively) the teleprompter from a desk model to one about the size of a drive in movie screen at the back of the room….see http://features.csmonitor.com/politics/2009/03/24/obama-ditches-teleprompter-for-drive-in-theater-movie-screen/

Anyone recall what he did to Gordon Brown (UK Prime Minister) when he was here a few weeks ago? Generally the two heads of state exchange gifts that have some meaning. Brown brought Obama a pen made from the wood of a ship that had historical meaning. Obama gave Brown 25 DVD’s of American movies. Wow…. is this significant or what? As if Brown could not afford to buy these for himself. A gift from Walmart. How touching. I’m certain old Gordon will hang onto those for years to come. What was the historical significance of DVD movies to one of our strongest allies? What about his removal of the statue of Churchill from the Oval office and its return to England? If he didn’t want it in his office, why not just put it somewhere else but not send it back as if was an abomination to him? http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/02/22/obama-returns-churchill-b_n_168919.html

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March 22, 2009

Letters From North America 03-24-09 Peary Perry

If I had to guess, I’d say that over the years, I’ve written more columns about the differences between men and women and how they think. Or how they don’t think.

For example, we didn’t get a chance to sort everything out from our house before we moved. Now we’re trying to do it after we’ve moved in. Not the best option and one to avoid if there is anyway possible. This should be one of the cardinal rules taught to young men who are about to be married for the first time. I’ve gone over these many times in the past and will likely do another column on them again in the future. These include taking notes on the day you get engaged. Copious notes about everything, the weather, where you went to dinner, what table you sat at, the waiters name, and most of all how your intended wore her hair and what she was wearing. This will come up in later conversations and there will be a test. I cannot over emphasize this to you at this time. You may think she doesn’t remember where you parked your car and in which direction it was pointed, but she does and she will ask you about it, trust me on this one.

Anyway, once you’re married, she’ll begin to collect and save things you cannot begin to imagine. You give her a Valentines Day card? She’ll save it. Birthday cards? Never thrown away. Mothers Day cards? She’ll keep them until she dies and then they’ll pass onto someone else, God only knows who. I have friends who have cards dating back to the twelfth century and earlier which have been handed down from one generation to another. I would think a ‘get well’ card from Genghis Khan would be worth something, but then again, what do I know? The point is that your wife will have stuff hidden away throughout your house for years in places you cannot imagine even existed. Women could write books about where to hide things that the DEA and FBI would never find.

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March 03, 2009

Letters From North America by Peary Perry 03-03-09

Stick a fork in me…I’m done. I can’t think of one place on my body that doesn’t hurt. Even my hair (what’s left of it) is in pain. I’d have to feel better to die.

In case you forgot, we have spent the last week moving from one house to another one. If you get the chance to do this, take my advice and don’t. Save yourself some grief. Stay in one place for as long as you can. Buy or rent a cave and make a conscience decision not to ever move for any reason. Trust me on this.

Our main problem is that we are moving into a house that is about 1300 square feet smaller than where we have been for the past eleven years. Our stuff just won’t fit. That is it won’t fit in any convenient sense of the word. Our house looks like a furniture store. Couches and chairs stacked up in bedrooms. Boxes against the wall, pictures wrapped and laying on the floor. I think we could put a sign in the yard and sell most of this stuff without any trouble at all. Just take cash, no credit cards accepted.

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February 21, 2009

Letters From North America by Peary Perry 02-22-09

So much to write about, so little time.

What do we have time to focus on this week? The economy? Nope, that’s being talked to death. Corruption? Where can we start? Unqualified politicians? Not enough time.

How about taxes? That’s a good idea and one we can all identify with. It seems to me that about 200 and some odd years ago, we protested  taxation without representation. Having sat through last weeks vote on the stimulus bill which no one in Congress had the time to read…isn’t that what happened in front of our very eyes?

The bill, as I understand it, was about 1100 pages in length and came out of committee about fifteen hours before it was voted upon. Obviously no one in this country had a chance to read the thing in it’s entirety before it came up for a vote. So, how can anyone say that the bill was passed with any level of understanding and comprehension? They can’t. So how can any politician honestly tell us they are representing us in this largest of all tax bills?

I don’t think they can.  The current mentality seems to be something along the line of … “We must do something, even if it’s wrong.” I don’t agree. The free market will naturally correct itself, if left alone. People will buy and sell things when the prices for those things reach the correct level. Just because you buy a house does not mean that the house you bought is guaranteed to go up in value by 20% each and every year. This is foolish thinking and has gotten a lot of people into financial trouble. Once the housing market stabilizes and gets to the realistic true value of the properties, then the market will start to expand and grow once more. Pouring more money into it, does not solve the problem.


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February 17, 2009

Letters From North America by Peary Perry 02-16-09

After nearly twenty months we have finally sold our home and will be moving in a week or so. I say a week or so, because it isn’t me that is in charge of this move. It’s my wife. The responsibility is on her shoulders, hers alone.

The other morning, I was wandering around the kitchen drinking a cup of coffee and looking at the collection of boxes, paper, tape and bubble wrap. I made a comment to my wife and told her that I didn’t seem to find any rhyme or reason to her method of packing all of our stuff. It looked to me as if she was working in all of the rooms at one time. My method would be to do one room and then go to another.

She placed her hands on her hips (a sign I have tried to avoid ) and told me in very low and pleasant tones that it had been her that had moved us at any time in the past and that she knew what she was doing and I should just stay out of the process. In other words, go away and let me do this. I am woman…I am in charge. Hear me roar.


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February 10, 2009

Letters From North America by Peary Perry 02-10-09

I know you’re hoping that this week’s column will touch on subjects like the economy and the stimulus plan which seems to be taking over our lives. Alas, it is not to be. I have had enough news to last me for some time and those of you who are interested in the news will certainly glean more from your local paper or your television. Not from me.

No, this week I’m going to take on a couple of topics which haven’t been in the news as of late.

The first is border security and the second is expiration dates on milk cartons. I know they don’t relate, but I’m working here to get something down on paper and you’re reading so what the heck? Stay with me.


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February 08, 2009

A Nation of Fools by Peary Perry 02-09-09

When I was in the army many years ago, we spent a lot of time trying to teach young soldiers how to perform close order drills. You could always count that one of the members of your platoon would be out of step. I can tell you that more than one once I heard one of my men tell me … “I’m not out of step….all of you are….”

Well, as Yogi Berra used to say… “It's deja vu all over again". This morning on one of the Sunday talk shows, Congressman Barney Frank was being asked why the American public had lost confidence in the United States Congress in view of all of the recent issues with tax cheats, lobby violations and other issues. Congressman Frank was quick to point out that “We didn’t just parachute in here, the voters sent us to Washington and (basically) it’s their fault for not holding us to a higher standard.”

Say What?

I don’t seem to recall single campaign advertisement in which some political wannabe makes a statement that he or she is going to steal, cheat or lie about their efforts once they reach public office. In fact, most of the advertisements I’ve seen say just the opposite.


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January 29, 2009

Letters From North America by Peary Perry 01-27-09

You would think that with all of the lay-offs, business closures and what not happening around the country, that the people still working would have some sense of urgency about them concerning their jobs. I’m not finding this to be true.

In fact, I am beginning to think the world is actually going mad. Slowly, but surely.

We finally sold our house, it took almost two years, but we did it. Yesterday I called the storage place where I have a storeroom. I asked them if a five by five was the smallest they had. They said yes it was. I asked how much and they said it was sixty dollars a month. I told them I already had a five by ten at their place and it was only costing me fifty dollars a month. They guy didn’t bat an eye and said… “Yep, doesn’t make any sense does it…but that’s the rates.” I believe I will stick with what I have.



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January 13, 2009

Letters From North America by Peary Perry 01-12-09

It seems to me that just about all of the instructions you need to get through life can be found in the bible. Perhaps I’m crazy but I think that somewhere in there it says that we would be better off teaching a man to fish than feeding him a fish for one day. This might be in the book of Hesitations, but I can’t be sure.

Anyway, I’m certain that the lesson is in there somewhere, even if I have gotten it all wrong so far. The point is that we are all better off teaching others to take care of themselves rather than giving them a hand out day after day, year after year.

So, how did I arrive at this topic for this week? Easy, the birds. You remember that movie that Hitchcock put out years ago? Well, that’s the scene at our house. We are overloaded with doves. The majestic birds of peace.

And the majestic birds of poop.


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January 06, 2009

Letters From North America 01-06-09

There was a story going around a few weeks ago. One of those annual holiday ‘feel good’ things that we all get from time to time. Anyway, this one had to do with some famous violin player in Washington, D.C. Anyway, this accomplished musician (Joshua Bell) set up shop in a subway and played some of his most difficult pieces for a couple of hours. I checked this story out on one of the urban legend websites and it came back as being true.

During the couple of hours this guy was there he collected some 32 bucks in tips, but no one recognized him or the fact that he was playing on a violin worth over 3 million dollars. His performances are usually sold out with tickets going for $100 and higher.

The point of this was an experiment in how we perceive beauty. Given that Mr. Bell was not in his natural environment, it is somewhat of a surprise to learn that no one stopped to appreciate the work and artistry of this person.


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December 22, 2008

Letters From North America by 12-22-08

In my younger days, I was often compared in looks to Alan Ladd. Then it was Robert Wagner….then Tim Conway. Last week it was Burl Ives. This is the end of the road for me. 2009 is going to be the new year for me. I am committed to losing weight and getting into better shape. Burl Ives , indeed! The person telling me this had to be at least eighty years old…perhaps his eyesight was failing. Who knows, but I can’t take a chance.

My last three columns have been written about bad things that have happened in this country and I promised to write something positive before Christmas, so here it is.

Last week a friend of mine had to opt out of playing Santa at a local church so he conned me into going in his place. Having the vision of Burl Ives freshly planted in my head, I decided to accept, knowing that this is the last year I would be able to play the part without extra padding. My golden retriever was very surprised to see me in a Santa suit. I think it dawned on her who I was and that she might get her wish for thumbs or a can opener.

 The church had no instructions, no training manual, no list of do’s and don’ts…just show up, be nice and it will all work out.


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December 11, 2008

Letters From North America by 12-09-08

What Happened to America? (Part Two)

Last week, I wrote a column about a nineteen year old boy in Florida who committed suicide on the internet and only one of the thousands who were watching this take place bothered to call the police. Oh, and did I mention that the young man posted his name and address? What a shame.

This week I wanted to write something about the upcoming holiday season and try to be in a more upbeat festive mood, but things just keep getting in my way. I really did have good intentions.

So what am I going to discuss this week?

Holiday shopping at its worst.

The day after Thanksgiving, up in someplace called Valley Stream, New York a Wal-Mart employee was trampled to death by the crowds rushing in to buy their on sale Christmas items. The police had been called to the store at 3:30 in the morning to help with crowd control. By 5:30 am the crowd was out of control and had become what one observer called a ‘rabble’. Wal-Mart workers tried to calm the crowd down but had no success. The glass to the doors shattered from the force of the 2,000 customers and as the mob made its way into the building, one 34 year old Wal-Mart worker was crushed to death as the ‘holiday’ crowd rushed over him.

Four other people, including one pregnant woman were injured and taken to a local hospital.

No wonder other parts of the world have a low opinion of our country.


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December 03, 2008

Letters From North America by 12-01-08

I trust your holiday was joyful. Now that you’ve had your fill of pie and cakes and have drifted off into a sugar high state of mind, I’m going to bring you back into the world of reality.

No, I’m not going to talk about the upcoming holiday season and all of the pretty lights and parties that occur this time of the year. I’m not going to talk about some wonderful Christmas cruise or vacation someone is taking.

What I’m going to talk about is simple.

What happened to America?

Last week, there was a story making its way around concerning a young nineteen year old boy who hooked himself up to the internet and then committed suicide while people watched. This young boy posted a note about what he was going to do along with a link to his website and camera. He was using a blog site from some body building forum. The young man was discovered by the police some twelve hours after he had died. What disturbs me is that almost no one attempted to get him any help or see if he could be stopped. Indeed most of the comments to the blog were taunts and messages ‘daring’ him to go through with his plan.


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November 20, 2008

Letters From North America by 11-18-08

Two weeks ago, when the election was over, I was in Germany and have to tell you what I read and heard hacked me off.

 

No, it was not the outcome of the election that made me mad, even though my candidate didn’t get elected; I was fine with the voice of the people. We’ll just have to wait and see what happens now.  Putting your campaign promises into the real world takes a lot of doing and I’m anxious to see if the current president elect has what it takes to get the job done for all of us.

 

What ticked me about the Europeans was the fact that they were gloating over the fact that in their minds after 154 years, the Civil War was finally over. As if it had been going on all these years. Where have these people been?

 

I think it’s a great testimony to this country to have elected Barack Obama to the highest office in the land. I don’t agree with his philosophy or the concepts he has put forth, but as I said, once reality sets in, we’ll see if everything he has promised will or can come to fruition.

 

However, having said that it surprises me that the Europeans seem to have a low opinion of us as a country and that somehow we would never be able to elect a minority to the office of President; I don’t see France or Germany rushing to elect anyone who appears to be a minority. In fact all I hear from the folks in those countries is complaining about all of the people moving in from other places.

 


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November 11, 2008

Letters From North America by 11-08-08

The long night is finally over. After nearly two years we have selected the leader of our country for at least another four years. At the time I’m writing this column, I am sitting in a hotel in Berlin. I woke at five this morning to see what CNN had to say about yesterdays election. By the time I got the television on… it was all over but the shouting.

At breakfast this morning, the English papers were reporting the event. Now the long knives start to come out. Not much of a honeymoon if you ask me. No, the papers in this part of the world, who had previously been so pro-Obama now are starting to question what effect his election will have upon the European community. Will his election and his lack of experience work for or against the other nations in the world? Questions were raised concerning the amount of money Senator Obama had raised for his campaign. How could a junior first term senator raise over 600 million dollars in such a short time? An unprecedented amount. Where did this money come from and who will Senator Obama be beholden to as a result? Where do any of these candidates of any election come up with the huge sums they need to get into office? You and I both know the answer to that question.



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A Nation of Fools by Peary Perry 11-04-08

I was raised in a middle class family. I knew we weren’t rich, but I didn’t think we were poor either. We always had a roof over our heads, heat, and food on the table. I had several pairs of shoes and got new blue jeans (I hated those) each year when school started. Most of my friends were in the same situation.

But, that’s where the similarity stops. I grew up in a school district with rich kids. I’ve often said it was like growing up in a vacant lot next to the bank. These kids were really wealthy. These were trust fund babies, mailbox money kids. I knew our family was different when I was working in a grocery store after school and one of the girls in my class came in with her mother. As I was sacking their groceries I heard the mother announce that she had forgotten to bring the coke bottles for the deposit. Her daughter didn’t know what a bottle deposit was.

Right then I knew there were people living in this world unlike myself. I cherished those bottles. You got two cents for cokes and a nickel for Canada Dry bottles. I cleaned out garages for free, if they would give me the bottles for payment.


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October 30, 2008

A Nation of Fools by Peary Perry 10-29-08

Over thirty years ago, I took part in a security training program outside of Washington, D.C. During the ten days or so that I was there, I met a number of federal agents who told me a number of stories, most of which would verge on the brink of unbelievable. One of these stories concerned President Kennedy and a decision he was said to have made one evening while sailing around D.C. on the Presidential yacht. According to one of the agents, President Kennedy had consulted with a number of his closest friends and had decided to leak our atomic secrets to the Soviets so there would be a mutual respect for each other and, in his opinion, reduce the threat of a nuclear war.

Now, in all honesty, I have no clue as to the truthfulness of this statement, but at the same time I have no reason to think the men telling me this were lying to me. I just don’t know.

What I do know is this, last week; someone who reads my columns sent me an e-mail and advised me to order a book called “Keynes at Harvard”. I found it on Amazon and must admit to you it is one of those books you will find hard to put down once you get started.

It is a handbook on socialism in this country. It was written in 1960.

The book explains how an economist named John Maynard Keynes got his socialist theories to be the order of the day at Harvard University. George Will (columnist and commentator) recently wrote “There are more Marxists in the Harvard faculty than there are in all of Europe.” The book goes on to state that the center point of the socialistic movement was the law school at Harvard.


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October 23, 2008

A Nation of Fools by Peary Perry 10-23-08

In November of 1989, I was in Germany when the Berlin Wall started to come down. My friend and I drove to the border where we could see East Germany. Parts of the wall were already destroyed and I brought back two bricks. Later that evening, my friend took me to dinner at his parents’ house where I met his sister and brother-in-law. His brother worked for Volkswagen in Germany and seemed a affable sort of fellow. During the dinner, the conversation turned to politics and it was apparent very early that he believed in a socialistic society. His concept was that no one should earn or receive more than 3,500 marks (before the Euro) per month, no matter what their job was or what they did for a living.

Having been in business for myself virtually all of my adult life, I took exception to this idea and told him it would destroy the concept of entrepreneurialism in any economy. He strongly disagreed and said that his plan would give everyone the same advantages and would be fair to all. This would eliminate class distinctions.

Then I asked him if he thought it would be fair for someone, like a doctor to have gone to school for eight or ten years or a attorney, should they be limited to only 3,500 marks per month as well?

“Yes, they should” was his answer and he was sincere.

Then I asked why anyone would want to go to school, or work twelve and fifteen hours a day to get a business up and going if their income was going to be the same as someone who didn’t have an education or who didn’t want to work. Who would want to do this?

He said that everyone would want to do so. If you had a good work ethic, then you wouldn’t mind working harder so that others could have a better lifestyle. It was your patriotic duty to do so.

I sat there in amazement at one of the most absurd things I have heard come out of anyone’s mouth in all of my years. The sad thing was he wasn’t kidding. He was dead serious.



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October 20, 2008

Letters From North America by 10-20-08

I’m a creature of habit. I like to pay my bills at the same time each month. Usually the same checks go out to the same people month after month, very boring.

My handwriting is terrible, I can’t recall how it got that way, but most people have a very hard time trying to make any sense of any thing I write by hand. Thank God for computers. I write my checks for my bills using a computer program which makes keeping up with things a lot easier.

All of my paid bills go into a folder for that month. I staple a copy of the invoice together with the bottom half of the check. Nice and neat. Then I print out a copy of the checks I’ve written and put it in the front.

I know this is boring, but I’m coming to the point. Our bills are generally so predicable, I can tell if I haven’t paid something and start to look for either a lost or misplaced invoice.

But, over time you start to see a pattern emerge that makes me wonder.


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October 19, 2008

A Nation of Fools by Peary Perry 10-16-08

You can stick a fork in me, I’m done. I cannot watch any more of the election news or reporting this year. I am fed up and will spend the rest of this month quietly reading a good book in some dark room of my house.

In my opinion, if you have not made up your mind as to who you want to vote for in the upcoming Presidential election, you must have either (1) been held in solitary confinement in a prison or (2) in the far off reaches of outer space or (3) you are too dumb to participate in the electoral process.
 
Up until last night I had fairly high hopes for our party in this country to pull it off and show the fundamental differences between liberal and conservative philosophy. But, alas it was not to be and last nights display showed me (along with many others) that in spite of months of rhetoric and name calling, it is still them… (Congressmen) and us.



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October 14, 2008

Letters From North America 10-14-08

To get your mind off of the upcoming election, I thought I would throw in a little humor this week. When will this be over? It seems like it’s been going on for at least a full year.

My 50 year high school reunion is coming up in about 18 months or so. Between now and then there are several things that I must get done.

First off, I need to lose about fifty pounds. I weighted 112 when I graduated, but I think that would be impossible for me to realistically achieve unless I stopped eating altogether for the remaining period of time. Even then I don’t think I would make it or if I did I would have to be wheeled in with all sorts of tubes and bags hanging on me. Not a good impression. This might have a dampening effect on the whole party.

Next, I have to have a hair transplant and a full face lift. I need to do this in the not so distant future since I want the scars to heal and for the surgery not to be so obvious. I think hair transplants such as the one Joe Biden got are really terrible, so I need to research what looks super natural. Oh, and I’ll need at least 5 hours a day in the gym to tone and muscle up my sagging body.

The last and probably most important part of this plan is to make a huge amount of money to pay for all of the items I’ve outlined above. Of course you have to allow for a complete new wardrobe for both my wife and myself. The money part is probably the stickiest part of my plan.

I realize I should have gotten started earlier, but some things just kept getting in the way.

Among them were kids and grandkids, jobs, houses, parents, taxes, health, school, and a raft of other things that seemed to occupy my time for these past 50 years. I sit back and think to myself that it sure seemed as if it flew by in a hurry. Just the other day it was 1960 and here it is 2008 already. Whoa, that was quick.

I think the last reunion I went to was my 25th. Someone on the organization committee  had printed the name tags in red ink. Trust me; you don’t want to do this. No one at the 25th wanted to be seen wearing glasses and the red ink in a dimly lit ballroom made the names virtually impossible to read. So, everyone ended up squinting and trying to grab a glimpse on the sly.

Of course it didn’t help that everyone had changed. Few of us looked like we did at age 18.

I don’t know why, but when I look in the mirror I see the same person I have always been. It’s when I am trying to run up several flights of stairs or lift heavy objects that my body tends to fail. I’ve also noticed that my eyesight isn’t as sharp as it was before and my wife tells me I need to invest in a hearing aid. I choose to believe I have selective hearing and will put off the hearing aid as long as I can.

The good news is that I think by this stage of the game, everyone should be past the point of trying to impress everyone else. No limo’s or other nonsense like that. No by this time in our lives I think all of us would be wearing sensible shoes with good arch supports as well as comfortable loose fitting clothing. Instead of your athletic prowess you should be glad to show that you still have all of your own teeth. As well as other material parts of your body.

Growing old or older certainly isn’t a lot of fun but it beats not growing older. I met a guy at lunch today who was 88 and says he is still trying to figure out what to do when he grows up. I want this to be my attitude. So many people are concerned over what other people will think of them and to be honest no one really cares. No one today will probably recall what you did or said 15 or 20 years from now.

Unless it was totally bizarre like my concept of a total body makeover and billionaire status within the next 18 months.

Now that would get people’s attention. I just wonder if I have enough time to pull it off.

Probably not.

Comments go to pperry@austin.rr.com

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October 05, 2008

Letters From North America 10-05-08

Dear readers: this is a column I put out several years ago….my wife as well as others have asked me to repeat it. Since I don’t catalog any columns by subject (I suppose I should) the only way I can find an old one is to go back and look at each one. So here it is…

Wow, what a week. ... not the time of the year for 1200 miles of car travel in Texas .... this is going to be a scorcher this year ... Spent an wonderful couple of days at a Bed and Breakfast in Austin. You can't call them a Bed and Board any longer ... because they don't "board" you, they just give you breakfast. It was very enjoyable and relaxing ... The place was quiet, clean and best of all the owners left us alone to do whatever we felt like doing ... my kind of place .. .I hope I can find others out there that are just as pleasant. I was telling the owner, about writing this column over a cup of coffee and he told me he had something funny he wanted me to read .... My wife and I were sitting on a swing on the upstairs porch drinking coffee as we went over what you are about to read .... I have to tell you both of our sides hurt from laughing so hard .... I wish I could take credit for having written this ... but, I can't...I do hope you find this as funny as we did ...

THIS IS AN ACTUAL ESSAY WRITTEN BY A COLLEGE APPLICANT TO NYU ..
3A. IN ORDER FOR THE ADMISSIONS STAFF OF OUR COLLEGE TO GET TO KNOW YOU, THE APPLICANT, BETTER, WE ASK THAT YOU ANSWER THE FOLLOWING QUESTION: ARE THERE ANY SIGNIFICANT EXPERIENCES YOU HAVE HAD, OR OTHER ACCOMPLISHMENTS YOU HAVE REALIZED, THAT HELPED TO DEFINE YOU AS A PERSON?


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September 30, 2008

Letters From North America 09-30-08

Someone, a lot wiser than I claim to be once told me that the best way to cover up a lie…was to tell another one any quickly as possible.

I’m not certain I agree with his advice, but I will say that in today’s race for the office of President of the United States, it certainly is beginning to look that way. Someone wrote me the other day and said that in his opinion the last really ethical presidential race we had was the Truman-Dewey campaign back in 1948. I was still a kid back then, but even then the newspapers had predicated a run away land slide victory for Dewey. You might have seen photos of Truman holding up copies of the papers with the incorrect headlines.

As I recall, at that time, the newspapers and the radio were the only method any of us had to keep up with what was going on in the world around us. I can remember as a small boy looking at a globe in my grandfather’s house and worrying over the physical size of the Soviet Union as compared to our country. I wasn’t aware of the population differences between the two countries.

My, have times have changed. Today in addition to newspapers and radio, we have television, the internet, e-mail, text messaging, blogs, cable and who knows what else. You can turn your television off for a week and for the most part you won’t miss a thing.


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September 23, 2008

Letters From North America 09-23-08

I must be weird…

Wait, don’t answer that. I already know the answer.

Last week I was sitting in the lobby at my dentist. His office has two entrances. If you come in the back door, there is a sign that directs you to the lobby by turning either left or right.

I have never given it much thought on which way I should turn. It doesn’t really matter to me one way or the other. Sometimes I go left, sometimes I go right. It depends on how I feel that day. I have no set pattern. Both ways are the same distance so either one of them will get you to the lobby in the same amount of time.

So, while I’m waiting, this lady comes to the reception desk and is clearly frustrated. She wants an answer as to which way she should turn when she enters the offices. Should she go left or should she go right? She says that she is confused and wants to make certain she is doing the proper thing.

The receptionist tells her that it really doesn’t make any difference, but she keeps going on and on about how difficult she finds the rear entrance to be. I want to tell her to just come in the front door and save herself all of the grief. But the better part of me tells me to just keep my mouth shut and let well enough alone. Personally I think the lady has too much time on her hands to be worried over something so trivial.

But then, that’s my opinion.


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September 11, 2008

A Nation of Fools by Peary Perry 09-11-08

Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus…..
And an Easter bunny...
A tooth fairy…
A magic genie in a bottle on the beach somewhere…
A pot of gold at the end of a rainbow…
A government that wants to help your family without costing you anything.

Ok, so I lied about the last one.

What I would like to see is the number of folks in the United States Congress who have either owned a business or who have actually worked for a living before entering into the nebulous world of politics. I’d bet the number is very small.

I cannot believe that any person, particularly those who have actually owned a business would be receptive to some of the proposals being bantered around this current political season. For some folks it seems the word ‘profit’ is actually a four letter word.

Let me explain. If you are in business, whatever business, you must make more than you spend each year or you go out of business. Unless you are the government who always spends more than they earn and borrows to keeps the government going. This is called the ‘national debt’. You knew that.

When you are in business, no matter what size you are, from a mom and pop ice cream store to a giant oil company such as Exxon, you pay taxes. You may not pay any tax on your profits, but you still pay taxes of every other kind. You pay property tax, payroll tax, use tax, sales tax, gasoline tax, unemployment tax, capital gains tax, school tax, Medicare tax …just to name a few. This doesn’t take into consideration all of the taxes you pay if you drive a truck (toll and road usage) or if someone dies and leaves you anything             (inheritance tax). The list goes on and on.


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September 01, 2008

A Nation of Fools by Peary Perry 09-01-08

This year’s presidential election has got the entire country riled up and monopolizing our daily conversations. McCain threw everyone for a loop when he named a WOMAN to be his vice-presidential choice.

The nerve of him….picking someone the media had no clue about before his announcement. That’s just not fair. That makes the left wingers have to scramble to dig up any and all dirt possible on someone that brings not a breath of fresh air but a hurricane of freshness into an otherwise lame race for the White House.

Let’s see, where to start? Well, for a study in contrast, Google up US Magazine and see what happens….Take a look at the hatchet job they have done on Mrs. Palin compared to the glowing cover story on Barack Obama.

Perhaps it’s the sense of fairness that lives within me that makes my blood boil when I see injustice in action. Take the National Organization of Women….have you ever seen or heard of them making any kind of protest over prostitution in Nevada or strip clubs? Or PETA who will rally and protest over the killing of a whale but says nothing about the abortion of millions of children. No, not a peep.

Now we have a WOMAN, who could, just could …end up being the president of the United States in a few short years and the fire and fury of the media has begun to raise its ugly head.


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August 27, 2008

Letters From North America 09-27-08

I don’t know about any of you, but I have always been highly suspicious of research being conducted with taxpayer money on objects none of us can see. Look at the amount of money spent on stealth bombers….if they were invisible….how would we know they existed in the first place? A smart contractor could just point to a vacant field and tell the congressional committee to “Just look over there…..isn’t that the prettiest sight you’ve ever seen?” I’m certain there are literally hundreds of research projects going on right now in all parts of the world using huge amounts of public money looking for things that cannot be seen.

I’d like to get in on those funds.

In case you don’t know, there is another project going on in Europe. This one is called the CERN project. So far, it has cost in excess of 2.8 billion bucks. The project is a giant particle accelerator and is built deep underground with a circumference of about 17 miles. The scientists (thousands of them) say the subatomic particles will travel 11,000 times around the accelerator each second when this thing gets powered up. Incidentally, the whole thing uses more power than the city of Geneva. I bet their electricity bill is going to be out of sight.


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August 19, 2008

Letters From North America 08-19-08

I can remember a time in my life, many years ago when I actually wished for more mail. As a kid I had a subscription to several comic books and was really excited when the latest issue arrived. I bet they don’t even have mail subscriptions any longer. If I received a letter from my Grandmother I was always thankful for her letter as well as the money she enclosed. Mostly the money.

But as we get older I find that going to the mailbox just doesn’t seem to be as much fun as it used to be. By the time you sort through all of the catalogs and special deals from people and companies you’ve never heard of, you are left with a pile of bills that you didn’t want in the first place.

From time to time I manage to get removed from most of the junk mail addresses, but somehow they find me again and start the process all over. There is one particular bank that sends me credit card offers a couple of times a week. I only wish I had the money they must spend on postage. Trust me….if they had access to mailing lists in the Middle East, I’d be willing to bet they could get a letter to Osama Bin Ladin in a matter of days. These people are relentless.

What makes me wonder is how do these people make any money? Most of the medical junk mail I get concerns so called ‘miracle’ cures for everything from dandruff to cancer. Some of the stuff is offered for free. I’ve made the mistake of responding to some of those and find that doing so causes your mail to increase at an alarming rate. On any number of occasions I’ve used a different first name just to see what happens. I can tell you what happens; they sell the name you give them to other direct mail companies. Thus your mail will increase. Count on it.



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August 12, 2008

Letters From North America 08-12-08

The last couple of weeks, I’ve tried changing up my weekly thoughts by going back to some satire and humor. Apparently it didn’t work since the page views onto my website have dwindled down to almost nothing. This tells me that you like to read my caustic comments on our government rather than some cutsie humorous fluff piece that I make up.  

So, here I go again with another poke at some of the common insanity that is going on in our country.

Last month I read a report that stated that the good old US government had paid out more than ninety two million of our hard earned dollars to Medicare fraud. It seems so called medical suppliers have been billing the government for wheelchairs and other pieces of home equipment for people who had already died. Not only had the patients died, but so had a large number of doctors who had originally prescribed whatever was needed.

Now, before I get too far into this article let me reiterate that this ninety two million dollars was the amount paid out by using the identification number of only dead doctors.

 Did you get that? Only dead doctors.


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August 01, 2008

Letters From North America 08-01-08

While driving in some of the more remote parts of this country, I have often wondered why anyone would want to move into some area that seems to be totally beyond reach of our modern society.

I think I’m beginning to understand.

With the deluge we are subjected to through newspapers, television, radio and the internet, not to mention phone calls and person to person conversation, we process an enormous amount of information each day. Most of it, in my opinion, is of the negative nature.

Today, there is a report about some insane rider on a bus that kills and decapitates another passenger. Hardly a day goes by without an execution, multiple murders, or violence by some gang member against our society. Just when you think it might stop, up pops some more from some other part of the country. We’re still looking for Nazi war criminals from World War II. Toss in the bad guys responsible for current atrocities and well, I think you get the picture. It isn’t pretty.



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July 28, 2008

Letters From North America 07-28-08

Currently there is a commercial running on television that shows how this country has become dependent upon foreign oil to keep us going. The man behind the scene advocates us using more natural gas as well as wind power. He goes on to show how our dependence has grown over the past thirty or forty years.

I’m getting various statistics ranging from 60% to 70% of all of our oil is imported from other countries. The records show that we imported 24% in 1970.

The statistics run all over the map. It’s hard to know which one is correct.

I do know whatever the number is, it’s entirely too much.

I well remember the oil embargo of the early seventies. It wasn’t pretty. Long lines, frustrated motorists…lots of businesses failed. We should have learned our lesson then.

But we didn’t.

No, we just kept on driving as if the oil would never stop flowing. And it’s going to kill us if we don’t fix it. The politicians all talk about something called an ‘energy policy’. I don’t know about you, but I’ve never seen or heard of one. I cannot think of any presidential administration that has publicly announced that … “This is our energy policy…”.

We’ve all heard words bantered around by various politicians over these past thirty or forty years, but nothing with any amount of substance. Certainly nothing that would indicate our desire to wean ourselves off of imported oil, especially from countries that do not like us.


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July 14, 2008

Letters From North America 07-14-08

To: Queen Elizabeth, Queen of England

Re: Household repairs

Dear Queen:

By all current accounts, I know you are in dire straits and in need of some advice on how to come up with the moola (American for dollars) necessary to keep you living in the style you have become accustomed to as well as giving you enough to make some long overdue repairs to your palaces.

We’ve been reading about the fact that some of your residences haven’t been updated in over fifty years. The reports I’ve read say the wiring is bad, the roofs leak and a lot of the rooms need painting and redecorating. One report says that your rooms haven’t been redecorated since your father died, which was sometimes back in the fifties, if I recall correctly.

I am appalled. I am shocked.

Even though you are currently receiving over eighty three million a year to keep up your current lifestyle, in today’s troubled economic times, that just won’t cut it will it? I mean, eighty three million a year just isn’t what it used to be, is it? I was also outraged to find that your annual maintenance budget of thirty million dollars hasn’t been changed in over fifteen years. Obviously the people who oversee your spending haven’t priced yard men lately.

Well, I am the answer to your problems. I am here to help you through these trying times and to get you back on the track to health, wealth and financial stability.


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July 08, 2008

Letters From North America 07-08-08

Several weeks ago, I wrote an article about the practice of our state legislature using so called ‘ghost’ employees. These, as you may remember, were employees who were carried on the states payroll as full time but actually performed little or no work at all. By having them classified as full time, they were able to receive medical insurance as well as retirement credits.

Well, now we have a new twist coming along to contend with…..ghost voting.

That’s right, ghost voting. Now that doesn’t mean that we have ghosts voting in the legislature of this state, it means that absent members get other members to vote for them. In other words, if I’m out in the lobby or down the hall in the cafeteria when a vote comes up, just reach over and press my button for me…thanks I’ll do the same for you next time you want to be gone.


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July 01, 2008

Letters From North America 07-01-08

I have just returned from another trip to Germany and the Netherlands. This time, I did not want to drive myself through the countryside, so I choose to take a train. Let me tell you, those folks know how to do it. The trains are clean, fast and most of all on time. If yours is scheduled to leave at 12:02, then you had better be on the platform waiting with your luggage because the train will leave at 12:02. Not, 12:03, the train will leave at 12:02.

When you are trying to get to smaller towns, you get stuck in various stages of commuter traffic. On one run I noticed that students got on (where the school was located) and rode several miles to get to where ever they lived. I asked them about it and they told me in very good English that they rode the train both to and from school each day.

These were ordinary looking kids, clean cut for the most part, joking and having fun, but serious about their studies and eager to talk. It was evident that they were interested in obtaining a good education so that their lives would be better and they would have more opportunities as an adult.


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June 23, 2008

Letters From North America 06-23-08

When asked about what this column is about, I usually respond with … ‘oh, it’s a humor column…kind of satire…’ something along that line. I was thinking that this week I could write a light piece about something humorous, but no, not going to happen this week.

In Texas, when you hire an attorney to do some work for you, I’ll bet you didn’t know that attorneys are not required to carry malpractice insurance for their practices. At least half of those practicing in Texas do not carry the coverage. Now, we all know that doctors carry malpractice in case they cut off the wrong leg or do something equally tragic to cause any of us injury. I don’t know that I would do business with a doctor who wasn’t insured. I’m not certain if insurance is required for doctors, but you certainly hear more about them than you do attorneys. Read on a little further.


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June 03, 2008

Letters From North America 06-03-08

Let’s see….the word ….illegal, what was the meaning of that word again?

Oh, yes….as I recall it means something is against the law. I think the key word here is …against. This means the opposite of for the law…it’s against the law…seems like it should be very clear.

However up in the great city of Dallas, Texas, there seems to be a heated discussion going on at this time over whether or not persons driving motor vehicles should be required to have liability insurance or not. It seems some silly old mean council person drafted a ordinance that allows the police to tow your car or truck if you don’t have a valid insurance policy for that vehicle.

You’d think this was a no brainer wouldn’t you?

Apparently not in Dallas, Texas.

Nope, the ordinance was opposed by several council members who felt that having insurance would place an undue hardship on those who cannot afford any more expenses. The ordinance was opposed on the basis that poor people should not have to choose between food, shelter, clothing and insurance. One member of the council stated their opinion by saying that they wanted the police to be ‘enforcing the law and fighting crime….not writing tickets to the poor in our society who cannot afford to buy car insurance’.


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